“Those shoes SO do not go with that belt!” “That guy couldn’t catch the ball if you gave him a bucket!” “She is such a teacher’s pet!” “Yeah, he’s so fat that he has to take a taxi to put on his coat!” These are the kind of statements that rage like wildfire through our high schools and junior highs. We’ve all heard people say things like this and many of us have been on the receiving end of such cruel words. With people these days picking apart every aspect of our lives from the way we dress to how coordinated we are it is no wonder so many of us have such a hard time fitting in.
Fitting in definitely did not come easy for me. In fact, it was probably the biggest thing I struggled with through junior high and high school. I was a pretty nerdy kid who did well at school but wasn’t really coordinated or talented in anything else (or so I thought). So I got made fun of a lot. And this was from kids at youth group and church. It finally got so bad that I stopped going to youth group for my eighth grade year. Then through high school I set about trying to get people to like me. I tried everything from changing the clothes I wore to changing my very personality. I tried acting like other people around me who were popular and that didn’t work. I tried dressing in latest fashions and name brands and that didn’t work. Nothing I did made me any more popular. With each failed attempt I just felt more and more lonely. But God always has a way of coming to our rescue when times seem the darkest. During one of my times of really deep depression I decided to read my Bible and I opened up to Galatians 1:10 which says “For do I now persuade men or God? Or do I seek to please men? For if I still pleased men, I would not be a bondservant of Christ.” This hit me like a ton of bricks! This was the reason nothing I had been doing to try to fit in had been working. I had been putting all of my effort into pleasing men when I should have been focused on pleasing God.
By focusing on God, He will shape me into the person He wants me to be and HE will put godly, supportive friends in my life.
So just how does one go about successfully fitting in? Well first off, stop trying. Whether we realize it or not, we all have tried different things to fit in. The most common and by far, most damaging, is we try to change ourselves. We find a group of people who we really like and who may or may not like us so we try to change who we are to fit in with them. This may be as small as changing what you wear or as big as completely changing what you believe and how you live your life. This is not the way to live life. God did not intend for us to go through life as chameleons constantly changing who we are to fit in with our surroundings. He created us as beacons of light in the midst of a dark world. Christians are often compared to lighthouses. When we choose to change who we are it is like putting a Starbucks where that lighthouse belongs. Sure a lot of people will like the Starbucks but it does no good to the ships that are about to be dashed to pieces on the rocks below. We are to stand for truth and shine our lights to the world with our foundations planted firmly on the rock of Jesus Christ! The key to fitting in is – be yourself! Be exactly who God made you to be. God doesn’t make garbage. He has made all of us unique and has given us all individual abilities, quirks, talents, and gifts so that we can best bring Him glory in the exact way that He designed us to. And by taking all of your time and energy away from being focused on fitting in you will be able to devote it to serving Christ and furthering His kingdom. God wants us to have friends. He knows that we need other people to support and encourage us. So if you feel like you are all alone right now, remember that your relationship with God is the one in this life that will never change so it’s worth putting the most time and effort in to. And be patient, God will provide. He certainly did for me. And if you have tons of friends and feel like you couldn’t be happier, be careful. Don’t let your earthly relationships become a distraction from your heavenly one. People like people who are confident in who they are in Christ. You don’t have to conform to some mold that society dictates. Be different, be spontaneous, be quirky, be yourself! Just do it all to the glory of God!
--Written by Ryan D.
Fitting in definitely did not come easy for me. In fact, it was probably the biggest thing I struggled with through junior high and high school. I was a pretty nerdy kid who did well at school but wasn’t really coordinated or talented in anything else (or so I thought). So I got made fun of a lot. And this was from kids at youth group and church. It finally got so bad that I stopped going to youth group for my eighth grade year. Then through high school I set about trying to get people to like me. I tried everything from changing the clothes I wore to changing my very personality. I tried acting like other people around me who were popular and that didn’t work. I tried dressing in latest fashions and name brands and that didn’t work. Nothing I did made me any more popular. With each failed attempt I just felt more and more lonely. But God always has a way of coming to our rescue when times seem the darkest. During one of my times of really deep depression I decided to read my Bible and I opened up to Galatians 1:10 which says “For do I now persuade men or God? Or do I seek to please men? For if I still pleased men, I would not be a bondservant of Christ.” This hit me like a ton of bricks! This was the reason nothing I had been doing to try to fit in had been working. I had been putting all of my effort into pleasing men when I should have been focused on pleasing God.
By focusing on God, He will shape me into the person He wants me to be and HE will put godly, supportive friends in my life.
So just how does one go about successfully fitting in? Well first off, stop trying. Whether we realize it or not, we all have tried different things to fit in. The most common and by far, most damaging, is we try to change ourselves. We find a group of people who we really like and who may or may not like us so we try to change who we are to fit in with them. This may be as small as changing what you wear or as big as completely changing what you believe and how you live your life. This is not the way to live life. God did not intend for us to go through life as chameleons constantly changing who we are to fit in with our surroundings. He created us as beacons of light in the midst of a dark world. Christians are often compared to lighthouses. When we choose to change who we are it is like putting a Starbucks where that lighthouse belongs. Sure a lot of people will like the Starbucks but it does no good to the ships that are about to be dashed to pieces on the rocks below. We are to stand for truth and shine our lights to the world with our foundations planted firmly on the rock of Jesus Christ! The key to fitting in is – be yourself! Be exactly who God made you to be. God doesn’t make garbage. He has made all of us unique and has given us all individual abilities, quirks, talents, and gifts so that we can best bring Him glory in the exact way that He designed us to. And by taking all of your time and energy away from being focused on fitting in you will be able to devote it to serving Christ and furthering His kingdom. God wants us to have friends. He knows that we need other people to support and encourage us. So if you feel like you are all alone right now, remember that your relationship with God is the one in this life that will never change so it’s worth putting the most time and effort in to. And be patient, God will provide. He certainly did for me. And if you have tons of friends and feel like you couldn’t be happier, be careful. Don’t let your earthly relationships become a distraction from your heavenly one. People like people who are confident in who they are in Christ. You don’t have to conform to some mold that society dictates. Be different, be spontaneous, be quirky, be yourself! Just do it all to the glory of God!
--Written by Ryan D.
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